Improve Your Sex Life part 1

Give Your Sex Life A Fresh Start

sex pen n paper improve your sex lifeThe first step to improve your sex life is to acknowledge what has already happened.  This is the hard work that many of us try to avoid.

Taking stock of the current state of affairs and the past can be very helpful.  It can also be harmful.

Try the following two exercises:(tip: read all the suggestions first before starting)

  1. Get into your body.  Breath deeply and notice how you feel in the moment.
  2. With a pen and paper make a list of all the things that aren’t the way you want them to be in your sex life.  Acknowledge them.  Contrast brings clarity but only if you see it.
  3. Notice your physical sensations.  Notice when things feel bad in your body.  Avoid being too hard on yourself and dwelling in the negative.
  4. Be as objective as possible.  You are noticing and acknowledging, not judging.
  5. Release the negative feelings you have tied to these things.  The best way to do this is to take personal responsibility for your experience.  That gives you the power to change your future experiences.  If someone else seems to be to blame take a deep breath and look at how you might have put yourself in the position to be hurt.

Once you have completed the above exercise pause, breath, and move on to the next exercise.

It’s time to look at the positives.

  1. Make sure you’re in your body.
  2. Again with the pen and paper – write down all the things that are good/positive/going the way you want.
  3. Make this list as long as your first list and then add 5 more things.

This exercise will help you to develop an attitude of gratitude and will help you to operate on a higher vibration making it easier to attract and manifest those things that bring you pleasure.

Find someone to share these lists with.  If you can’t find someone you are welcome to send them to me.  Why?  Because being witnessed is the best way to release shame.  Chances are you have some shame around the things that didn’t go well.  By sharing them and putting the light of day on them their power diminishes.  You may also get great feedback that can aid in acknowledging and releasing the negativity!

A Fresh Start For Your Sex Life In 3 Steps

Fresh start in your sex lifeIt’s December and I love it when a new month starts!

I know we can start fresh anytime – and, for some reason turning to a new calendar month helps a little more. It’s like I mentally and emotionally loosen my energetic grip a bit.

Why would you want to start fresh?

Whether what’s happened before was good or was bad (in my judgement) it can take the power out of our present if we don’t release it.  If it was bad we can be dragged down by the negativity.  If it was good we could rest on our laurels and be under motivated in the present.  My November was mostly great personally and professionally and while that is exciting I also had a few things happen that I didn’t love.

By letting go of all that has happened previously and starting new I can open myself up to not only living in the present but also feeling my desire, benefiting from the energy of that desire, feeling the strength of my sex drive and libido, and make sure I’m on track with my sexual health and sexual progress.

There’s a saying

“If you live with one foot in yesterday and one in tomorrow you’re pissing all over today”.

Is starting fresh a challenge?

If you are struggling with making a fresh start I have a few suggestions that might help the process.

  1. Acknowledge what has already happened.
  2. Find a way to release it.
  3. Fantasize and visualize how you want things to be.

I’ll be sharing more about each of these steps in the coming week so make sure to sign up for my newsletter by claiming your free vulva stimulation guide on the right=====>

A Different Kind Of Spring Cleaning

All the kinky people in the community are probably thinking about enemas,
douches and the like and while I would be happy to share info on those
topics (just ask) that is not what I had in mind.
Enema Spring Cleaning

I am actually going to talk about a spring cleaning for your thoughts and beliefs
about sex and sexuality.  I work with a mentor and she has taught me a lot
about beliefs and how to let go of the ones that don’t make me happy.

People ask me a lot of questions about sex but the #1 question is how did I get
into this line of work.  They want to know how I could be doing something so
different from social norms.  They want to know how I do what I do happily and
with a clear conscience against the way most of us were brought up.

I think the reasons they ask me are different for different people.  Some are
simply curious but many wish they could do the same thing.  Not that they want
to work in the adult industry but because they want to experience the sexual
freedom and happiness that it looks like I’m having.  Because all the sexual
knowledge in the world doesn’t make much difference if you can’t make the
decision to take action and put it into practice.

I have learned through years of personal growth meetings and workshops to
make self-inventory a part of my daily life.  By incorporating the additional piece
of examining my beliefs, letting go of the ones that don’t work for me and
embracing the ones that do I have been able to create a life-style beyond my
wildest dreams.

I invite you to join me now in examining personal beliefs around sex and sexuality
so you too can clean out and release the beliefs that don’t work for you and
experience the best sex life possible.
I'm In Button

The first step is making a decision.  Are you in?

Naked Travel With Nikki

Yes, I said naked!  Does that mean you’ll be getting to see me nude?
Not necessarily…

naked travel logo

I’m going to be sharing the naked truth about sex and sexuality as I
travel and speak all over the country:)

Get Naked With Me!

9/1 Between The Sheets Live Broadcast At The Erotic Heritage Museum –

8-9pm PST  Come say hi as I broadcast live from the Erotic Heritage Museum.
If you are out of town you can listen live at

I’ll be there supporting

9/10-9/14 New York Trip

I’m going to work with a couple of East Coast clients.
I will have time to meet with new clients as well.
Email me for more info.

I am also looking for opportunities to connect so if you have a group or club
that you would like me to speak to about my Salacious Solution for Frustrated Lovers
respond to this email.

9/13-9/23 Speaking at the Rockstar Marketing Bootcamp in LA:)

I am totally excited to be presenting my book
Mild To Wild: Fun And Easy Ways To Heighten Your Intimacy
on the same stage as world famous inspirational speakers
like Les Brown, Glenn Morshower and others!

If you are an entrepreneur click the link above and check the event out.
It’s been an extremely valuable resource to me as a serial entrepreneur
and I would love to meet you there!

I will also be available on a very limited basis for one-on-one appointments
when I am not tied up with the conference.  Email me for more info.

Make It A Sexy Day!


Travel | Sex | Intimacy

Summer is in full swing (June 20th or 21st is the
official first day of summer depending on the website
you look at) and for a lot of people that means travel.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on travel &
sex / intimacy please do and you’ll get a thank you
gift from me:)

I’ll be covering this topic on Saturday night at 8pm PST
on my radio show “Between The Sheets”.

between the sheets

I personally enjoy traveling and am planning on doing
more of it during the second half of the year.
Let me know if you want me to come to your city since
I will follow where business takes me:)
I already know I’ll be in LA during the second weekend
of August to speak at the New You Event
(save $398 when you use my code – the word sexy)
that will be all about health, wealth and relationships.

sex travel

Right now I’m planning a personal trip and for the
first time I’m actually taking sex and intimacy into
account for the trip. In the past I just left it up to chance
and sometimes it happened and sometimes it didn’t.

We usually travel on the cheap staying with friends
and family which I love but sometimes that can infringe
on sexy time since we didn’t want to be too loud or
get interrupted.

Of course, there’s almost zero chance of sexy time
happening on a trip when we bring my daughter
since we share a room and …
well, sometimes she’s a light sleeper.

blue balls

This short trip is the first time hubby and I are traveling
without her in years and I’m starting to research a bit
about the night life of San Diego.  Although we’ll be
busy during the day we might try to check out a swingers
club at night if we have energy:)

Recent private lessons have been amazing!

Couples traveling to Las Vegas on their vacations have
been having private lessons with me on a variety of topics:

  • How to help her enjoy anal penetration
  • How to find her g-spot
  • How to give a better blow job
  • How to incorporate power exchange (Dominant and submissive)
  • How to find his prostate
  • How to massage his cock
  • Tease and denial for him

If you are interested in a lesson/session send me an
email with your interest.  Sessions start at $300 and
educational packages are available at a discount.

I look forward to reading about your travel practices and
giving lots of thank you gifts!

Again, the link to take the survey is

Make It A Sexy Day,

This me in front of Cesar’s Palace after a couples appointment:)

Nikki at Cesar's



Spring is in the air, are you feeling creative? I am!

Do you feel any excitement stirring in your gut about new possibilities
or maybe pain in your gut from irritations of things not done
and projects not started?
I know I have both!

I have soooo many things I want to do and at the same time I am
remembering new years resolutions I made just 4 months ago
that only lasted 3 weeks.

There are other things that I have stuck to and WOW are those things exciting!
One is my position as The AdventureSex Mentor.  I have put some
new content on my site and prepared my first big event.
I am so stinkin’ excited!

As for the resolutions/goals I made at the beginning of the year
I know that I was either not in alignment with them or it was not the
right time for them to manifest.  Now I am re-evaluation those to see if I should re-commit.

My question for you is did you make any goals around relationships
or sexuality?  If you are in a relationship with a significant other did you
evaluate where you were and where you wanted to be?  And if so, did you
have an action plan or break down the goal into bite size pieces to
make sure you had progress?  Did you talk to you partner and
agree on these together?

Also, whether you are in a relationship or not, did you have any fantasies or
desires when it came to performance or experiences?  I know a lot of people end up
using their sexual needs as a distraction from daily life and feel guilty
about pursuing them and only turn to them as a break from the day to day grind.
Then, we feel guilty because we weren’t spending time the way we thought
we should by being “productive”.

I propose a new way of looking at it.  By including sexual goals with the rest of your
life goals you will feel a lot better about indulging in sensual activities.
You will even schedule them into your day and week!  Or you will just know
that at some point almost every day you are going to do something for
your sexual pleasure, growth and progress and will embrace it fully with no
guilt or remorse!

My husband and I both took a good hard look at our relationship in January.
There were some changes that had to be made.  And we also set some goals.
These were sexual in nature and I’m not sure if you want to hear them
but if you need some ideas let me know.

If you set relationship and sexuality goals in January I’d love to hear them!
I’d also like to know your successes and challenges.
Remember me as a resource when you are going through this process.
I promise total discretion and anonymity:)