Difficult To Maintain An Erection In A Group Sex Situation?

Guys – Are you having a hard time getting it up or keeping it up in a group sex situation?  If so this is totally normal and something you can work through.

As a sex coach and swinger I know that for many people the thought or desire to be in a group sex situation can be very erotic.  The challenge is that we usually don’t have many situations like this in our real life so we can be surprised how challenging it is to actually take advantage of these situations when they arise.  I have many people come to my classes extremely excited about the group practice time only to be frustrated because it doesn’t work out they way they thought.

It is possible to work through this.  Most things we do are habitual and if you have a habit of having sex in one or two ways it may be difficult to enjoy sex in other ways or circumstances.  In order to work through this you need to practice getting to know your body better and following erotic energy more than using a set pattern that you know will work to bring you to climax.  That set pattern will not work under all circumstances whereas following the erotic energy will.

Because erotic energy is subtle and body based many of us need to practice sensing it in order to have access to it.  This is where I come in as a sex coach.

  • I work with you to become more mindful in your solo sex or partner sex activities.
  • I will witness you in solo or partner sex if that seems to be beneficial to reaching your sexological goals.
  • I’m able to accompany you to swinger clubs to coach you in real time to feel the flow of erotic energy in a group setting.

To be clear – I do not masturbate or have sex with you.  I do not touch you in any of these circumstances.  I guide you verbally in ways that will help you to key in to the flow of erotic energy.  Through exercises and homework practices I teach you to become more and more sensitive to the subtle sensations that feel so so good.

Email or text me to set up a time to talk about working with me so you can enjoy group sex situations to their fullest!

Warmly,
Nikki
Nikki@NikkiLundberg.com
702.674.6606

P.S.  I work with people from around the world as an online sex coach.  With the telephone and skype there are few limitations.  For people in Las Vegas I’m happy to provide in person sex coaching.  Also a disclaimer – although working with me can be very therapeutic I am not a sex therapist or marriage counselor.  If there are issues beyond my area of expertise I will require that you seek treatment from the appropriate professionals in order to get the most out of our work together.

#1 Blow job tip with Sex Coach Nikki

My #1 tip is to use your own body as a guide for giving pleasure. In order to do this you must get centered and sensitive to your own sensations. You need to focus on the experience, not the performance.

Do you have any questions giving head? Ask in the comments below or send me an email at nikki@nikkilundberg.com

Anal, Bali, Masturbation | Checking in

Anal Update

The “Art Of Anal Pleasure” class was AMAZING.  We had a full house and 2 amazing demonstration models.  One was a gentleman who was a very experienced anal player who got to have his limits stretched by having an audience view his play.  The second was a beautiful mature woman who on the outside seemed so sweet and innocent but once she got naked and I had my strap-on in place she was voracious!  I was able to demonstrate all the anal positions I know with her.  Everyone learned something new and a good time was had by all.  I look forward to Anal August:)

Bali Trip

sex coach nikki gets a happy ending massage in Bali

All male therapists at this spa:)

I went to Bali for the end of April to attend a women’s retreat.  It was transformational.  Without the hustle and bustle of everyday life I was able to feel into some deep desires.  Several came up.  Here are some:

  • to work with more people as a sex coach over the phone and over skype
  • to work with more women in a healing capacity – helping with painful sex and numbness
  • to partner up with other professionals so I can have company when I’m working
  • to have more fun in my business

I’m so happy to be back home.  I love love love so many things here in Vegas – my family, my business…  I definitely missed it all.

Did you know that there are not any sex toy stores in Bali, Indonesia?  I did not until I was looking for one.  I was going to indulge in buying a new sex toy – part of the the point of the retreat was self care so I wanted to make sure to take care of myself sexually as well – and no one could help me.  I finally found out that it wasn’t legal in Bally.

So when we had a free day I sought out a happy ending massage:)  Actually, I’d already gotten a few massages (they are only $15 an hour there) but none of the girls would go there with me.  I was finally able to get some relief when I went to an all male therapist place.  I had this 25 year old island boy and he was very good at taking direction:)  I felt MUCH better after that.

Happy Masturbation Month!!!

sex coach Nikki, masturbation month, masturbation coachYup, May is masturbation month.  It’s something I love personally and professionally.  Professionally it’s one of the most important tools I use in my sex coaching.  There are many things you can incorporate into masturbation that will have a therapeutic benefit to either overcome sexual dysfunction or expand a person’s experience of pleasure.  I’m truly enjoying the work I do with people that includes masturbation coaching.  It creates a deep connection very quickly and that helps us move through issues powerfully and completely.

I put up a couple if informational videos on my youtube channel for masturbation month.  What do you think?  Click here to visit my channel

How are you?  How may I be of service to you this summer?

Please take a moment to drop a note with an update about you and yours.  Ask me any questions you might have.  Let me know if something I’ve shared has helped you out.

Delayed Ejaculation

Email Nikki@NikkiLundberg.com to more information on sex coaching and masturbation coaching.

Delayed ejaculation is also known as retarded ejaculation or impaired ejaculation. This is whenever is it taking you longer than you would like to ejaculate and you are frustrated. You may also be getting tired or sore from sex or masturbation before you ejaculate. Some people constantly experience their partners frustration since they haven’t cum yet and they are tired or sore.

There are many possible causes for delayed ejaculation both physical and mental.

My approach is to work with you to review your sex history and together uncover beliefs and thoughts that might be affecting you. Optionally I witness your masturbation practice in a way that releases shame and can show me where you might make some changes in your physical practice.

You will experience more pleasure from your body, have improved confidence and experience deeper satisfaction by the time we are finished working together.

Email me to set up a time to talk so we can see if we would be a good fit Nikki@NikkiLundberg.com

Masturbation Benefits

There are a TON of benefits to be had from masturbation and you can exponentially increase how many you experience by practicing mindful masturbation. My favorite benefit is stress relief. Our daily lives are filled with stress from many sources and with masturbation you can use erotic energy to move the stress through and out of your body.

For more information about mindful masturbation and the masturbation coaching I offer send me an email at Nikki@NikkiLundberg.com Let me know what you’re interests are and we can schedule a time for a quick chat to see if we would be a good fit for working together

I invite you to celebrate masturbation month with me by trying something new and letting me know how it works out. If you are interested in the therapeutic benefits even better. I love sexual healing! While I am not a licensed therapist my methods are very therapeutic. I truly enjoy being a masturbation coach because I get to co-create with my clients and be with them on the journey as they experience rapid improvement. The point is not that people need to learn how to masturbate – it’s that they can use certain masturbation skills and techniques to overcome common sexual dysfunction and to expand their experience of pleasure.

Practice

practicePractice
prac•tice noun
1. habitual or customary performance; operation
2. habit; custom
3. repeated performance or systematic exercise for the purpose of acquiring skill or proficiency
4. condition arrived at by experience or exercise
5. the action or process of performing or doing something
6. the exercise or pursuit of a profession or occupation, especially law or medicine
7. the business of a professional person

This is the word on my mind this morning as I think about what I am inspired to share with you today. I want to practice coaching. I went to an immersion weekend where I learned a lot about coaching and I’m aching to practice what I’ve learned. It’s the same ache that inspires me to learn more and more about sex and pleasure. It’s the ache – the desire – that motivates me to reach out and be as effective and productive as I can be.

I began the adventure of entrepreneurship 10 years ago. I began my sexual adventures 6 years ago. 4 years ago I fused the two as I experienced two things:

1. I needed a business based on my true passion
2. People are in a lot of pain around sex and sexuality and could use some help

Working with a mentor was key for my growth. Having someone to put their full exquisite attention on me and my life who had “been there and done that” is invaluable. This is what I’ve wanted to do for others – to be able to go deeper and have a stronger connection so they can manifest their desires.

desireNow I’m in a program that is teaching me some amazing coaching techniques. But like a dream, as time moves me further away from my class some of the things I learned are wafting and evaporating away. I feel a sense of urgency to practice what I learned ASAP.

Do you have an ache – a desire – that needs some exquisite nourishing attention? Do you need someone to put their finger on the just the right spot, to hold you or stimulate you according to the direction you are moving in?

I am at your service.

red line

Sex Coach NikkiHere’s my offer:

20 minute telephone sessions for $47 –
• limit 2 sessions per person
• can be used together or separately
• valid for one year
• includes a recording of the call

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20 minute video chat session for $57 –
• limit 2 sessions per person
• can be used together or separately
• valid for one year
• includes a recording of the chat

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My Masturbation Awareness

As a kid I began my masturbation as I explored my vagina in the privacy of my own room.  I experienced more and more pleasure and I first identified my orgasm at around 10 or 11 years old.  After making out with a boy who penetrated me with his finger I started experimenting with internal stimulation.  That was where my masturbation practice stayed until my mid twenties.  I experimented with vibrators and found them to be too intense and more of a distraction than helpful.  I also started exploring anal stimulation during my solo sessions once a partner tried anal sex with me during partner sex.

I almost always masturbated during partner sex – I found out through masturbation that it was only through direct clitoral stimulation that I was able to reach orgasm (or so I thought).   I would masturbate if I was tired and wanted to fall asleep quickly.  I would masturbate if I was horny.  When I began my journey as a sex educator I started to masturbate for new reasons – to know myself more deeply, to learn new things sexually and to meditate.

The masturbation meditation that I have practiced has provided some amazing insights both for myself and for those I have worked with.  Through direct hands on practice we can intimately learn our own anatomy of pleasure and how to have a deeper and more expanded experience of that pleasure.  We can work through issues we have with ourselves around sex, love, intimacy and image as lightning speed.  We reach a new level of self knowledge that allows us to communicate much more effectively with our lovers.

By having masturbation meditation as a practice I was able to learn how to improve my sex muscles.  This allowed my orgasms to become stronger.  With continued practice I was able to identify more subtle peaks, climaxes and orgasms in my body and enjoy a broader spectrum of pleasure.  I also learned how to ejaculate.

Meditation had never been a strong point in my life.  I had desire for it but it wasn’t until I joined a class that had daily masturbation meditation as part of the curriculum that I was able to have the consistency I craved.  Doing it with the teachers leading and the other students sharing experiences gave me the structure and the payoff that I needed to stick with it.  Some of them went on to keep it as a daily practice after the course. 0 I did it daily for the course which was 2 months long and after that sporadically.

That 2 month experience changed my sex for the better.  I found not only through direct personal experience but also through the experiences of my classmates that deep and profound progress could be made in the areas of overcoming sexual dysfunction, increasing sexual pleasure, smoothing emotions and opening the spirit.  That is why I have made it one of the bedrocks of my sex education programs.  The power of sexual healing in real and we all hold it in our own hands.

As Masturbation Awareness Month approaches I will be sharing more about how you can get these same benefits in your life.

Click Here to find out about the upcoming 30 Day Self Pleasure Program

 

 

 

Anal Massage Lesson For Young Couple

Sometimes you have to try something totally different.

Couples Sex Coach Session For Christmas Part 2

anal massage sex coaching for conservative couples Sex Coach Nikki LundbergThen I asked them if they had ever considered anal sex.  They said no but they were open to it.  I had her flip over to her stomach and began massaging her glutes and sit bones.  I explained to him all that I was doing.  Using lots of lube I began to massage the crack of her ass.  Very slowly.  I told her before every change in stimulation I made.  I went from that to direct pressure onto her anus.  Using my 3 fingers together I placed them broadly against her anus and pressed into her body slowly increasing the pressure until it was firm checking with her all the time to make sure it was feeling good.  She enjoyed all the external stimulation.  I moved on – slowly – using one fingertip to massage her external sphincter.  Just dipping the tip of my finger into her anus I gently applied pressure – up, to the right, down, and to the left – checking at each point to see if she felt pain and also explaining to her boyfriend what I was doing.

Since everything was feeling good I sunk my finger in a bit deeper so I was penetrating her inner sphincter.  I repeated the pressure in the four different directions.  At this point she wasn’t feeling pleasure just pressure.  I explained that that was fine and that she would take some time to become used to this type of stimulation and to allow it to become erotic.

I slowly began sliding my finger in and out of her anus.  I just kept my finger straight and didn’t apply any pressure in any direction.  She was able to take my entire finger into her anus without discomfort of any kind.  I told them that they would most likely be having anal sex before they had vaginal sex since she wasn’t feeling pain in this area.  I gently bent my finger aiming my finger tip toward her pubic bone.  For the first time she felt the pleasure of pressure against her g-spot.  At the same time she felt like she may have to have a bowel movement.  I reassured her that there was no fecal matter in her rectum and it was just habit that when she felt pressure in this area it meant she had to go to the bathroom and that with practice that physical signal would change.

Her boyfriend wanted to try so I moved and he sat where I had been between her knees.  I coached him to go slower and slower.  He did and was so pleased when he was able to penetrate his girlfriend without bringing her pain.  He began sliding his finger in and out of her anus.  As he got more excited he began to speed up and she asked him to stop.  He did and I explained that the tissue is very sensitive and this is a new type of stimulation.  Over time he would be able to “finger fuck” her and even add a second finger.  I told him that the sign that she would be ready for anal sex is when he is able to smoothly slide tow fingers in and out of her anus without causing discomfort.

We mutually decided she felt done and it was his turn to work with me.

25 Year Old Virgin Couple Due To Vaginal Pain

Private coaching sessions are available via phone, webcam and in person.

For more information visit http://www.nikkilundberg.com/sex-coach-products-and-services/private-sessions/

There are many sexually conservative cultures throughout the world.  I work with you to observe your comfort levels and provide the most informative pleasurable experience possible.

sex coaching for conservative couples Sex Coach Nikki Lundberg

sex coaching for conservative couples Sex Coach Nikki Lundberg

 

 

A great resource for people suffering from Vaginismus is http://vaginismus.org/

Happy New Year!

I am super excited for 2014 because every year has gotten gotten better and better for me and 2013 was fricken amazing.  The last week was no exception…

Couples Sex Coach Session For Christmas Part 1

I met with a couple who were visiting from out of town.  They had been looking online for a massage therapist and came across my site.  Seeing that in addition to offering massage I also offer sex coaching they set up an appointment with me.

They were very nervous.  Neither one of them had done anything like this before.  They were in their mid – 20s and were both virgins.  This was not by choice.  They had been in a committed relationship for several years but had several problems when it came time for penetrative sex.  This had caused their passion to wane and even though they had enjoyed oral sex in the past the fun had even left that because of their frustration.

When I arrived we discussed their situation and their histories.  They were both from a very conservative culture that didn’t allow for free sexual expression and experimentation.  They had never found someone to consult with.  They said they would be much more comfortable if I would be nude with them as they were very ashamed of all these issues and I offered it.  Seeing and being seen is the best way I’ve found to release shame.

I began with examining her.  She said she felt pain in her vagina.  I slowly examined from the outside starting with the abdomen and vulva asking all the time what her arousal level was.  When she reported that she was more than 50% aroused I began exploring her inner labia, clitoral hood and clitoris.  Still all pleasure – no pain.

While I was working with her the boyfriend asked if he was allowed to touch himself.  I said sure that it was normal and natural and this was an erotic situation.  He was surprised he wasn’t more physically aroused and I explained it was because even though this situation might be very close to the fantasies he held in his mind I was still keeping things fairly clinical.  I suggested he enjoy what was happening rather than judging it against what he thought should be happening.

Continuing my examination I began to slowly penetrate her vaginal opening (the entroitus).  Now the pain started.  Pinchy.  Burning.  Bad.  I got out some castor oil and applied it liberally to my finger and to her vulva.  Slowly – painfully slowly – I sunk my fingertip into her pussy.  The majority of the pain was strongest on the bottom.  I shifted the pressure to the top of the opening and that worked until I got to the second knuckle and then she felt pain there too.  I noticed that she would tense up periodically and I pointed out the signs to her boyfriend so he could tell when he need to slow down just by her non-verbal cues.

 

A Fresh Start For Your Sex Life In 3 Steps

Fresh start in your sex lifeIt’s December and I love it when a new month starts!

I know we can start fresh anytime – and, for some reason turning to a new calendar month helps a little more. It’s like I mentally and emotionally loosen my energetic grip a bit.

Why would you want to start fresh?

Whether what’s happened before was good or was bad (in my judgement) it can take the power out of our present if we don’t release it.  If it was bad we can be dragged down by the negativity.  If it was good we could rest on our laurels and be under motivated in the present.  My November was mostly great personally and professionally and while that is exciting I also had a few things happen that I didn’t love.

By letting go of all that has happened previously and starting new I can open myself up to not only living in the present but also feeling my desire, benefiting from the energy of that desire, feeling the strength of my sex drive and libido, and make sure I’m on track with my sexual health and sexual progress.

There’s a saying

“If you live with one foot in yesterday and one in tomorrow you’re pissing all over today”.

Is starting fresh a challenge?

If you are struggling with making a fresh start I have a few suggestions that might help the process.

  1. Acknowledge what has already happened.
  2. Find a way to release it.
  3. Fantasize and visualize how you want things to be.

I’ll be sharing more about each of these steps in the coming week so make sure to sign up for my newsletter by claiming your free vulva stimulation guide on the right=====>